My father taught me wisdom, and my mother taught me truth—together they taught me peace.
My parents have been married for 56 years, and together they’ve been my greatest classroom.
My mother, a relentless truth teller, taught me the power of honesty. My father, a patient teacher, showed me the strength of wisdom lived quietly.
He would tell me,
“Choose your battles carefully. You don’t want to end up fighting all these little battles and lose the war.”
As a Black woman, that lesson became survival. I learned early on that my energy was sacred. My father would also say,
“Never let anyone put a quarter in you and watch you go.” Translation: never let anyone control your emotions.
That one stayed with me. Because guarding your peace is not weakness; it’s wisdom.
My dad set a standard for integrity. He never made a promise he didn’t keep, and that shaped me. It taught me that words matter. The Word of God tells us the same:
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4:23
Why does this matter? Because your heart is your mind. What you allow into your mind shapes your inner world, which then determines your words and actions. Guarding your heart means being intentional about your thoughts, ensuring that what flows from you is true and purposeful.
But this is a battle, and the enemy knows this. He’s cunning, calculated, and patient. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: satan has well-laid plans. He’ll camp out for as long as it takes to achieve his goal, and one of his favorite tactics is distraction.
That’s why my father’s advice still echoes in my spirit: don’t spend your energy on every small battle. When you fight
every
slight, every
rumor, every
misunderstanding, you end up too tired to win the war that actually matters:
YOUR DESTINY.
Working in corporate America, especially in spaces dominated by men, taught me that discernment is strength. I had to learn when to speak and when to stay silent. I had to learn that telling someone off doesn’t make you powerful; it just means someone found your button and pushed it.
My father called it
“putting a quarter in you.”
The enemy calls it
“mission accomplished.”
Peace is your superpower. Guard it like treasure.
When you meet people, do a fruit check. Scripture tells us,
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control".
Galatians 5:22.
That’s your checklist,
not social status,
not shared trauma,
not convenience.
Some people need to be re-evaluated (like Equifax, TransUnion, or Experian 😂) every time you meet them. You never know what spirit they’ve come into contact with since the last time you interacted with them.
As you grow, you’ll find yourself becoming more protective of your peace, not out of fear, but because you finally understand what it costs you to obtain it.
If you’re already living in peace, I celebrate you. You’ve paid a high price to get there.
If you’re not there yet, congratulations, you’re reading this, and that means you’re ready to start. You’re part of what I like to call the
Excavation Nation. Together, we’re uncovering truth, wholeness, and the strength that’s already inside us through Jesus Christ.
Stop crying over yesterday. Don’t spend all your energy preparing for a future that makes you miss today.
Live here.
Now.
Surround yourself with those who walk in truth. Protect your peace. And remember, the destiny Jesus died to give you is already yours; reach up, grab it, and claim it.
With love,
Your friend, Jackie
